The Value of an Apology

When did you last apologize?

I’ve counseled many people in troubled marriages. One couple owned a large and thriving business, but they were on the verge of a divorce.  Little by little, each had offended the other. They weren’t communicating, for Satan had built an invisible wall between them. I listened to their shared hurts while each pointed out the other one’s faults. Then I asked a simple question, “When was the last time one of you apologized to the other?” There was dead silence. Finally, the wife whispered, “Never. We never apologize for anything.”

I had identified the root issue, so I pressed in. I explained Nicky Gumbel’s wonderful lines: “The first to apologize is the bravest. The first to forgive is the strongest, and the first to forget is the happiest.” I shared how Christ forgave us while we were yet sinners, and the Apostle Paul instructed us to forgive one another, just as in Christ, God forgave us. Suddenly, the husband fell to his knees and burst into tears. Taking his wife’s hands, he lovingly apologized and asked for her forgiveness. She broke into tears as well and asked for his forgiveness. A marriage was saved and a business remained intact. It was one of the most beautiful acts of reconciliation I’ve ever experienced. Sincere, heartfelt humility expressed in a simple request: “I’m sorry, will you please forgive me?”

Anybody you need to apologize to today? Confess your financial secrets, mismanagement of funds, or your harsh words. Then ask for forgiveness. The value of an apology is priceless.

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